Beware the $2 Mouse

Back a year ago, Fiona requested a mouse. It seemed like a nice idea -- they're so small and cute -- and it wasn't like she was asking for a $200 chinchilla. At $2, Ralph seemed like a bargain. Well, there was the cage and other rodent accoutrements, but the over all cost was under $50, and if I recall correctly, Fiona picked up most of that tab. Since we already had 5 guinea pigs, we were buying tons of bedding, so the small amount he needed was about as negligible as his size.

Then Fiona decided she wanted a 2nd mouse. At first, this seemed like aninvestment of just $2 more. But Algernon didn't get along with Ralph, so we had to get a 2nd set of accoutrements, which also meant that Shirra, who was cleaning the cages of all the animals, had one more job each week. Sadly, Ralph died shortly after we got the new mouse. It seemed like Algernon wouldn't last much longer, too, when he started losing fur.

We took him to our wonderful vet, Dr Malamud, and she suggested treating him for mites. This required $22 shots once a week as well as a few tests. We tried some antibiotics, too (we're now on the second round of them). We've also had to change his bedding a bit more often.

Not including the 'human' cost of the time we've spent cleaning his cage and waiting at the vet's office, the actual cost of this $2 mouse is verging on $300, and that's only because the vet has been kind to us in her charges.

Beware, dear reader, the $2 mouse!

Now, I've spent more than that on purebred cats, and Shirra's hedgehog was $200 for a pet you can't hold without gloves or small blisters, so I'm not begrudging the cost. It's just that Fiona rarely plays with Algernon these days. For the most part, it's more like she's the adoptive but neglectful mother of a mouse and 2 guinea pigs who serve the function of unused Christmas presents. Parents enjoy giving them, and children enjoy receiving them, and telling their friends that they have them. But that's pretty much where the joy ends.

Bah, humbug.